The impact of pet loss is unique for each of us – as unique as the human-animal bond that each of us forms with our animal companions. For many pet guardians, animals may be the primary source of emotional and social support. Pets are members of our family. You may even think of them as children, best friends, partners, companions or confidantes. Perhaps you share your hopes and dreams, your grief, joy, struggles and even your greatest secrets with your animal companion. For others, the human-animal relationship is a bit more complicated. Living with a beloved pet who struggles with big feelings or behavioral problems or has special needs can create a relationship with many layers.
Regardless of the nature of the relationship, we all have a vision about how life that would unfold with our new pet. We don’t envision a time when our animal companion would no longer be by our side – a time when we would face impossibly difficult decisions about our pet’s life. Planning for a pet’s end of life is not something that any pet guardian ever wants to think about. However, planning ahead allows you to think through possible options and prepare for possible complications so that you are not left making decisions “in the moment”. Having a plan in place to guide you can free you mind to spend precious quality time with your pet.
Every Pet Guardian is Grieving a Different Kind of Loss
Whether you are grieving the loss of a pet or experiencing anticipatory grief, you will feel a wide range of responses: emotionally, cognitively, physically, socially, and spiritually. You may have questions about the grief process, feel that others do not understand the depth of your grief, or seeking a safe place to ask questions and discuss options. It is perfectly natural to feel emotionally vulnerable as you process these intense feelings. There is no right or wrong way to grieve. Each pet guardian walks their own journey.
Loss of the pet you envisioned
- Your pet struggles with behavioral, physical or neurobiological challenges
- Life circumstances have forced you to consider rehoming your pet
- Behavior has escalated to the point of considering behavioral euthanasia
loss without closure
- Your pet went missing and was never found
- A family pet passed while you were away at college or living far from home
- Your pet was lost in an unforeseen accident
life-changing diagnosis
- Your pet has lost vision and/or hearing
- An injury has resulting in amputation of limb or paralysis
- A diagnosis leaves your pet with life-changing??
aging or terminally ill pet
- Your aging pet is approaching end of life.
- A terminal diagnosis has forced you to face difficullt decisions
- Your pet’s quality of life is declining
Do Not Walk through Grief Alone
I am not a human therapist, psychologist or counselor, but am a certified End of Life Companion Animal Doula and am also a professional, certified dog trainer and behavior consultant who specializes in fear and aggression. This combination of trainer and death doula means for almost a decade I have helped clients through pet loss, whether from natural aging, unexpected medical issues, accidents or behavioral euthanasia. I also have navigated my own personal companion animal losses and can relate to and provide support with the caretaking and grief process you’re going through.
As a Pet Loss Bereavement Specialist, Certified Dog Behavior Consultant and Professional Dog Trainer who specializes in fearful and aggressive behaviors, I have helped clients naviagate pet loss and make difficult decisions. Over the years, I have faced many end-of-life decisions with my own animal companions and can relate to the the decisions and grief that you are facing. I am here to support you and provide objective feedback, educational materials and/or additional resources to help you make fully informed decisions.
I am here to help you with:
- End of iife planning
- Resource and information gathering
- Objective Quality of Life measures
- Advocating for your wishes for your pet
- Planning for quality time with your pet
- Exploring palliative or hospice care options
- Discussing/planning euthanasia options
- Researching and planning celebration of life events, tributes and memorials
- Non-medical, emotional support and guidance
I am here to support you by:
- Providing objective feedback to aid in your decision-making
- Holding a safe, non-judgmental space where you can share your thoughts and grief
- Being empathetic and listening with understanding and compassion
- Providing a connection to keep you from feeling lost or alone in your grief
- Helping you process feelings of guilt, anger, remorse and sadness
and the truth is you will miss them because they are missing from you. the piece that once fit so perfectly into your world. your life. your heart. they were nestled in. embedded. woven into your skin like a blanket. and perhaps we were asked to walk differently after they were gone because everything changes in that moment – everything. holding brokenness in one hand and light in the other. we will, no doubt, change our gait to compensate. so wile we are limping more profusely in grief, i hope too that we are loving more profusely. loss can teach us that. may it never be the reason that we close up our hearts.
‘the piece’ by ullie kaye
Art by Lucy Campbell
Services
From the moment you get that terminal diagnosis for your pet, have another bad incident that makes you question how long this can go on or even as your dog is naturally aging, your grief process starts and continues through the moment you say goodbye and into the mourning period. My services are tailored for each client to provide the support you need at any given time, whether that is helping you communicate with your veterinarian, providing qualified guidance on behavioral euthanasia candidates, helping you objectively review quality of life assessments, discussing burial and cremation options or deciding the best ways to spend meaningful time with your pet. In addition to guiding you through the caretaking phase, I can help you plan memorials or projects to remember your beloved pet.
Paws & Remember offers both individual and group support for adults. Whether your pet is a dog, cat, gerbil, bird, snake, horse or fish, I look forward to providing support as you travel your this journey.
Assessment for Surrendering, Rehoming or Behavioral Euthanasia
Assessment sessions are for anyone who is considering surrender, rehoming or behavioral euthanasia for their pet.
This 60-minute virtual session is a safe, non-judgmental space to help you navigate these difficult decisions with objective input from a certified dog behavior consultant.
This is NOT for clients who are looking for training options or animals with a terminal diagnosis or in end-of-life stages.
End-of-Life or After-Death Pet Loss Support Session
For clients seeking support with navigating end-of-life planning, after-life decisions and/or associated grief.
This 45-minute virtual session can be conducted with your camera on or off – whichever you prefer.
No committments to packages.
Schedule sessions as needed.
End-of-Life or After-Death Pet Loss Support Session
(1 month of support)
For clients seeking ongoing support with navigating end-of-life planning, after-life decisions and/or associated grief.
This monthly support package includes 4 scheduled, 45-minute support sessions PLUS text support throughout the month.
End-of-Life or After-Death Pet Loss Support Session
(3 months of support)
For clients seeking ongoing support from end-of-life decisions, anticipatory grief and after death grief support.
This 3-month package includes 12 scheduled, 45-minute sessions with text support for 3 months.
Group pet loss grief support session
Group sessions work well for adults who have processed the loss of their pet and are functioning well, but still benefit from the support of others who are also experiencing the grief of pet loss.
Each 60-minute, virtual session is limited to 6 participants. Email for information on dates and times.
Role and Scope:
As Pet Loss Bereavement Specialist, I provide non-medical supplemental support, advocacy, and education to a client or family. Family refers to spouse, partner, family member(s), or friend who the client wishes to include. I am independent, insured, self-employed, and work for the client or family, not a specific hospice, palliative care service or animal hospital or clinic.
I do not practice under any medical licenses. Please reach out to your Veterinary Professional with any medical questions or concerns.
I am not a mental health professional. If you are struggling to function on a daily basis, having difficulty getting out of bed and/or struggling to imagine going on without your pet, please reach out to your primary care physician or mental heath professional. You can reach the Suicide Hotline by dialing or texting 988.